Red Flags

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RED FLAGS🚩



I want a lover who wants to hear me. I can't say when exactly and even now, am better single than taken for granted....


Toluwani cried out loudly, she said to me, " this motherf***er doesn't care about my mental health!" Tolu and Femi recently celebrated 5 years of being together.


So what went wrong?


I was so inquisitive and I needed to know what happened. I called Femi and Tolu, heard from both sides and the biggest lesson I learned in their relationship is, "never ignore the red flags."


What are Red flags in a relationship?

Red Flags are signs indicating a reason to cease or back away from an unhealthy relationship. When you start a new relationship, the romance, love and excitement can blind you, and you may not be conscious of the signs. 


Red Flags to watch out for when you're dating someone.


1) Abusive Behaviour.


This is one of the biggest and most obvious red flags that people ignore. Abuse varies in different forms, it can be physical, emotional and sexual abuse. Leave the relationship if your partner is abusive. There is never a good excuse for an abusive relationship.


2) Controlling/Manipulative Behaviour.


This is a huge red flag!

If your partners give you Do's and Don't in a relationship. If they tend to control how you dress, the type of food you eat, the friends to associate with and others.

You are dating a control freak. Control freaks are obsessed with getting things done a certain way. 


3) Gaslighting.


This is a manipulative behaviour. They blame you for something they did or hold you responsible for the way they reacted to a situation. They 

call you “too sensitive” or “crazy” when you express your needs or concerns. They manipulate you to the point that you start feeling insecure.

If he exhibits this behaviour, leave the relationship.


4) Constant Fight/Anger Issues.


Constant fighting over little things that are just irrelevant, get's angry easily, very hostile, has frequent explosive outbursts or switches emotions instantly...These are red flags.


The bottom line: If you think you’re encountering a red flag in your relationship, get the heck out of the relationship.


 Don’t endure nonsense in your relationship. Ignoring red flags in a relationship in the first place is a big red flag.

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